Fenxy

Citizens of 9rules. This is a public broadcast of the 9rules BioResponse Devision. Today the Pokémon note went beyond 1000 replies. Further evidence shows that the Pokémon is spreading to new notes — and careful analysis has revealed that the situation has become a Biohazard Level 4 threat.

What might at first sight appear to be a nice and cuddly animal, is in fact, a vicious disease. The Pokémon agent transmits through physical contact, and some speculation is that visual contact is enough. Upon contact, the antigen known as the Pikachu enters the bloodstream. At the blood-brain barrier, an electrical current is released from it's tail — temporarily paralyzing the brain's filtering mechanisms — allowing the Pikachu to infiltrate the cranium and gain control of its host.

Symptoms of the Pokémon include rabid typing, often visually identified by missing characters, cryptic acronyms and disregard to standard grammar. Such as: "lolz ur rly rly dum" or "i rly like 9rules u 2?".

If no action is taken, the following is the projected spread of the Pokémon in the coming 3 weeks.

Within a mere 3 weeks, the world as we know it will cease to exist.

We are therefore issuing official quarantine procedures as precautionary actions to prevent further spreading. Read and follow these instructions carefully.

If you have come in contact with the infected, it is imperative that you contact your nearest community leader who will provide further instructions

1. Even though tempted by cute looks and high-toned voices, do not under any circumstance approach a Pokémon.



2. If you experience any symptoms, contact your community leader immediately.
3. If you notice a friend exhibiting any of the symptoms. Gently place a bag over his head, contact your community leader and wait for assistance.



4. If you do not have a bag at hand, contact your community leader and wait for assistance. While waiting, refrain from encouraging his behavior, for example by replying in instant messaging style or by awarding points. Such behavior can incite the Pokémon infection.
5. Wear protective garments on your face at all times. If you do not have a gasmask, hazmat suit or anything similar at hand — you're doomed.

Follow the 9rules notes for further and live updates on the situation. If the Notes are at any time incapacitated by the infection, emergency broadcast systems will be made available through Pownce and Twitter.

Godspeed.